Sun gleaming, and the wind whistling
gentle silence.
-And you there, making Love’s presence felt
listening intently, hearing no more than a whisper.
And then the notes strike you, and you seem to gasp.
Something amazing! Your eyes round tell
These notes so sweet, so complex, so utterly intricate waft breaking silence.
And then your eyes fall on the River;
You gasp again.
Like diamonds! No- Ten thousand stars instead.
Sparkling, dazzling, streaming gracefully to eternity seeming.
You turn to me again, opening your lips to say it all
which remains open, saying nothing.
Unaware that lay before me, three perfect beauties
-the melody, the River,
And the girl.
Yes, darling, my melodies inadequate to describe what’s true
And yes, darling, the River flows in you.
To begin this post, I'd like to start off with a song reference ( as I often do :) ).
In the words of Biffy Clyro's 'Many of horror' (song inserted below for the 'interested and lazy'):
When we collide we come together
If we don't we'll always be apart
I'll take a bruise; I know you're worth it
When you hit me hit me hard
So...
In many ways I find these lyrics profound, and in some ways, relevant to me. It's all about being in love with someone who is technically 'bad for you'. Although with this song, its more about an abusive relationship either emotionally, physically, etc, I can identify falling for someone when you know 'it' will never work out, and will inevitably end up hurting you ( get my drift now?) .
Often I find myself doing this, albeit on a far smaller scale, and to a lesser extent. And I won't call what I feel/felt 'love' per se, but attraction of varying intensities.
I was thinking of going into specifics initially, but have decided against it.
Presently, I feel this way for a few guys(really few okay!) at the same time- all of varying degrees, and subject to change at any point. Yes, I do think we can all feel this way about the opposite sex at times- feelings are really hard to deal with, especially when young.
And funny enough, with all of them I have the same problem. We're never around each other for too long. But when we're together its great and despite all the fluctuations there's still this level of permanency that I do like them that way. And I can't wait to see them, but life happens and I can't be near any of them. And with each of them is something unique about who they are, but also something so obviously 'wrong' about the relationship itself, that shouldn't work.
Yet I still find myself wishing it would.
Arrgh- I doubt I'm making much sense, so I guess I'll just end this with a quote that may or may not explain what I'm feeling...
Actually this time I have a couple:
'I've learned that there are people that truly love you, but they just don't know how to show it'
'Late at night when all the world is sleeping, I stay up and think of you... and I wish on a star that somewhere you're thinking of me, too'
'I just wonder how many people never get the one they want, but end up with the one they're supposed to have.'
